Love or Money?

Question:

Not sure how to word this but I will attempt to. Money over love or love over money? A man's desire for love is powerful & so his his desire to be a provider so what happen when a man chooses a woman who has money over one he has this deep love for? The desire for love is great so will he have to eventually heed to the call of love??

Love or money??

Dear Love or Money,

Anyone embarking upon a relationship because of the desire for love is living from a posture of insufficiency. The question also begs consideration of the woman who reaches for a man who can provide economic security rather than one with whom she finds "love". Either way insufficiency seems to be what drives the individual's desire for relationship.

The desire of a man to provide is somewhat of a socia/cultural* stereotype. The man who is compelled to live with this value system may feel the pressure to believe himself inadequate and undeserving of his preferred love interest if he cannot meet social standards of worth. When this happens, the relationship will be overshadowed by shame. He will find ways to recover a sense of dignity. He will not find it as long as he lives believing in his insufficiency. Shame leads to dishonesty and dishonesty leads to the cover-up. It is very difficult to build a healthy relationship under these circumstances. Disappointment will be unavoidable.

We all choose according to our value system. We cannot avoid this. If we live believing in insufficiency, we will live with an inclination toward possessiveness couched in the mask of security. We will value security over the threat of loss. Mind you, the threat of loss is not proof of loss. All that is necessary however is the belief in loss to increase and solidify the value for security. Money will be more valuable than Love when Money is believed to provide more security than Love. If this is the case whether revealed in the man or the woman, Security will win. All you can do is observe this truth and observe the truth a person shows you.

"When a person shows you their true colors, believe them the first time." ~Maya Angelou

Deep love has no value except to the person with the deep love. Sometimes deep love has more value than deep pockets, vice-versa. Love demonstrates its greatest value when it evidences the need for nothing. In this it is free to give everything without losing anything.

We all will heed the call to Love. It is our true nature. There is only one true security --- Love. It has been said, "perfect Love casts out all fear." If this is true, then where love perfects itself, there is no fear. If there is no fear, there is no need for security. Security eludes the need for conversation because it is not a plausible conception.

When the Lover lost in his/her desire for love realizes this, there will not be a question of Love over Money or Money over Love. There will only be the question of...

"How can I use my life to Amplify the Volume of Love in all moments?"

Marquis

*"socio/cultural was Borrowed from Kevin A Johnson (Facebook Friend)